The quick cut: A girl struggling with intrusive thoughts and her gender identity finds her way to self acceptance.
A real review:
Thank you to Labyrinth Road for providing the arc for an honest review.
Self acceptance is a tricky thing, especially when your brain functions differently than most others. Every part that makes you unique makes you question if you're truly deserving of happiness. For Ariel, this is an all too familiar feeling.
Ariel struggles with the violent thoughts that come to her mind. Calling it a crocodile, she wishes she could get these sudden awful ideas to stop intruding her mind. Unfortunately, she's never seen a therapist since her father is fervently against the idea. With her sister off at college and her closest friend in DC for the summer, she gets a summer job at a carnival. Will her summer of solitude turn into one of self discovery?
I've never been a poetry person, but a number of times I've thoroughly enjoyed tales told via verse. In this case though, I got to the end and found myself frustratingly disappointed. In this situation, I think the writing style actually worked against the material.
The relationship with her sister Mandy was woefully unexplored. The moments where her sister shared mental health information with Ariel were easily the most touching. I really wish there were more of those in the pages of this story.
Ariel is struggling with who she is, which is a common process when you're neurodivergent. While I can't claim to be OCD, I related to the moments of questioning and wondering and wishing you functioned differently. This book captured that element well. The problem is that it really didn't capture anything else at that same degree.
It also seemed as if Ariel just bounced from one struggle to the next instead of consistently worrying about them. She would worry about her thoughts, then her gender identity, then her friendships, and start the process over again. It surprised me she never was concerned about them all at once, which isn't an experience I've had with the people I know who have OCD.
A story that struggles to make a lasting impression.
My rating: 3 out of 5