The Way I Am Now by Amber Smith

The quick cut: A girl and guy who dated in high school give it another chance when they're both in college. Chaos ensues when the trauma from back then continues to haunt them now. 

A real review: 

  Thank you to Margaret K. McElderry Books for providing the arc for an honest review. 

 Trauma has a way of lingering. Where physical pain often has a defined timeline and cause, psychological pain isn't that straight forward or easy to tackle. This is something that comes up again in college for Eden and Josh. 

 Eden is starting college, but her assault that defined her high school years continues to stick around. Agreeing to testify in the trial process, she tries to focus forward as she runs into Josh. Josh is watching his father go through rehab and staying clean once again while he manages college due to a basketball scholarship. Can these two make a relationship work now? Or is their difficult pasts still too fresh to make a relationship work? 

 I adored the first book, so I definitely thought I'd adore the second. Maybe I'm the wrong audience here, but this book definitely felt like filler. The trial doesn't come up as much as you think it would and they really end in a place that leaves you hanging. 

 Eden is clearly still struggling with her PTSD. While she does see her therapist and take medication, she also is having a difficult time not letting what happened haunt her. I have so much sympathy for the journey she's taking, especially since it's one I know many take. 

 Josh is adapting to his life now that his father is getting help with his addiction, but it's hard to believe it will stick this time. He's also having a hard time admitting what he wants and pursuing it rather than doing what others expect of him. It's a process you see him take throughout the book. 

 It's a good story, but very slow in pace and that's not my preferred speed personally. There's plenty of character depth and development though, so if that's what you enjoy as a reader - this one is for you. 

 A slow paced contemporary romance with mental health representation. 

My rating: 3.5 out of 5